Dear Countrymen:
What has the world come to!!!??? Curfews in my beloved Iraq!!!??? Oh the tears I have gushed in my luxury penthouse...I mean “holding cell.” Our nation used to be renowned for free expression and bohemian sensibilities. But no more!!! Since evil Bush the second has seized control of our land, people are told how and when they can leave their homes! And this is only the beginning!!! I hear rumors and mutterings of skateboard bans in Sadr City, raids on dog tracks in my hometown of Tikrit, and most frighteningly...NO MORE SPRING BREAKS IN BASRA!!!!!!!! We must band together to stop this madness!!! If we continue to slumber, we can surely kiss keg-stands, topless juice-bars, and water-slides goodbye!!! Don’t let the cursed infidels take our Paradise and put up a parking lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What has the world come to!!!??? Curfews in my beloved Iraq!!!??? Oh the tears I have gushed in my luxury penthouse...I mean “holding cell.” Our nation used to be renowned for free expression and bohemian sensibilities. But no more!!! Since evil Bush the second has seized control of our land, people are told how and when they can leave their homes! And this is only the beginning!!! I hear rumors and mutterings of skateboard bans in Sadr City, raids on dog tracks in my hometown of Tikrit, and most frighteningly...NO MORE SPRING BREAKS IN BASRA!!!!!!!! We must band together to stop this madness!!! If we continue to slumber, we can surely kiss keg-stands, topless juice-bars, and water-slides goodbye!!! Don’t let the cursed infidels take our Paradise and put up a parking lot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lovingly,
Saddam
Thursday, February 23, 2006